Before you get started we need to have a talk.
While you’re preparing to take over for your sibling, 2016, I need to have a few words with you. If you weren’t aware this year has been, well in the bluntest of words, crap. I don’t know if before 2016 left they were some sort of jerk, like the older sibling who popped the heads off your dolls or tore the wheels off your toy trucks, or if maybe they had a sweet disposition and you were all rooting for them to do great things. No matter what anyone thought about 2016 before it happened, they certainly made a mess of it once they got here.
The entire year has felt plagued by tragedies, and even when we thought it was over, the crap kept hitting the fan. Within the last week of the year we have continued to lose well-loved celebrities and honestly as I write this I am just hoping we don’t lose anymore within the last couple of days. Everyone did their yearly wrap-ups much earlier in the month of December, thinking that nothing more terrible could happen, yet it did. As we mourn those we lost and prepare for you to show up, here are a few things I need you to do.
Seriously you can’t take any celebrities, or if you feel like you absolutely need to you get one, you seriously get just one. It needs to happen at the end of the year after some pretty epic celebrity news the rest of the year. I need you to be the year of weddings, babies, adorable new couples, and brand new pets, just anything that will make us smile. You also need to be a year for advancements and discoveries in health and science. You know if you were the year that we found a cure for cancer that would be pretty epic. I want a rise in new and diverse movies, tv shows, webseries, I want a surge of creativity from all those amazingly talented people out there. Now beyond that I need you to focus on making sure people feel safe and happy. You 2017 need to swoop in and try to make people feel better after everything that happened in 2016.
Now after that talking to, good luck 2017! You better not screw this up.